


you are the image of my heart

by supersecretintergallacticninjaprincess



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Canon Compliant, Dream Pack, M/M, So he makes his own friends, Temporary Character Death, alter ego, kavinsky is kinda lonely
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 12:23:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9607481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supersecretintergallacticninjaprincess/pseuds/supersecretintergallacticninjaprincess
Summary: Kavinsky keeps cutting himself up into different people.





	

Kavinsky is fifteen when it first happens. He is fifteen and jaded and he drives into a pond. It's partly because of the heat and partly cause he's high but it becomes a lot less funny when the car doors won't open. He curses, 'cause why the fuck does a dream car have to act like a real car, his subconscious fucking it up and making it real. He starts suffocating after a few minutes, maybe hours, so he throws his head back, thinks fuck it and downs some green pills. 

When he wakes up in his bed, he stretches in front of the mirror and thinks "I am fucking immortal". 

***

The thing about being a mob kid is you get everything easy, and the thing about being /the/ mob kid is you get everything. 

Kavinsky is sixteen, he wakes up next to an expensive hooker and grabs her purse. Rifling through it, he finds "cerise" lipstick, some condoms, a few pills, which he downs with a sip of vodka, some nail polish, and loads of other shit. He grabs the lipstick as an afterthought, when he tosses the bag on the floor, he draws a dick on the hooker's cheek and he thinks "god, I wish things wouldn't come so easy". 

The next morning, he wakes up next to a naked boy with long legs and golden skin. He licks his lips and the boy turns, looks at him through narrowed eyes and long long lashes and mutters "Fuck off" then turns around again. Baby's first words. Kavinsky throws his head back and laughs. It's perfect. 

***

Some days, when the drugs go round the wrong roads of his brain, Kavinsky thinks of his mother. He thinks of her long legs and her narrow hips and the dejected slump of her shoulders and the redness of her eyes and the slur of her words and some days he thinks "So this is how you murder beauty" and others he cries. On one of the desperate days, spent crying softly curled up in a corner with a bottle in one hand and his face in the other, he regains consciousness when shaken awake by a pale bony hand made up of knuckles and bruises. He looks up and sees that it belongs to an equally bony and bruised boy, who takes one look at his face and laughs. He laughs for minutes, without stopping, almost weezing and at some point, without quite knowing why, Kavinsky joins in. "Come on K", the boy says, "let's throw some fireworks at this shitty town". 

***

The thing is, Henrietta isn't ugly as a town. Perhaps that's the problem. It's a collection a quaint little houses and churches and corner shops, full of homemade knitted oven mitts and freshly baked pastries and he can't quite bear it. So when he sees a boy with broad shoulders pushing his way through the air like the mere pleasantness of it all is a thick and pungent current to go against, he thinks finally. A fucking kindred spirit.  
Ronan Lynch however, doesn't really care what Kavinsky thinks. Their eyes meet on the highway and he just overtakes him without a second glance. That's when the cars start. He's dreamt cars before, but this is different. Kavinsky' backyard becomes impossibly big, covered in rows and rows of white Mitsubishis, each one faster than the last, more detailed, all with unlockable unlocked doors and powerful, aggressive facades. That's where he finds the next dream boy. Except it's a girl. She's got short hair and small breasts, but it's a girl nonetheless. There's something unsettling about her, the whites of her eyes are too white, glaring, and she's got long red nails, sharp as knives. She grins when she sees him, and tosses him some keys. 

***

They become a gang after that. Kavinsky's gang. He laughs at that, him and his alter egos, laughs at the fact that people consider them separate entities.  
The townsfolk see them approaching and quiver, lock their doors and hide. Sometimes, they snarl and rise to the challenge, and none more satisfyingly so than Ronan Lynch. Their first race leaves Kavinsky trembling uncontrollably, left behind in a trail of dust, with Swan laughing breathlessly next to him. "Wow", she says, "that boy really is something else."  
Skov, pupils blown wide in the backseat, drools. 

***

The police find Kavinsky's body soon after, bloated with water, extracted from a pristine dream car. That's when Kavinsky's dreams start dying. He's different from his corpse. He looks in the mirror and thinks "when did I become like this", because he is not what he was when he died. He starts waking up next to strange creatures. Some have feathers and scales. Others look a lot like Ronan Lynch. The worst are the ones that look like grotesque versions of Kavinsky himself, staring at him with dead eyes and over taught grins when he turns in his bed. He gets Jiang to take them out and burn them. 

The thing about having died is, once it kicks in that it really happened, Kavinsky starts thinking maybe something's missing, that he didn't dream himself quite as good as new. He starts dreaming about holes in his sternum and missing bits of his brains and one day he wakes up and there's a pair of arms encircling him. "What do you care what's missing? You'd destroy it all anyway" is the first thing this boy says.  
Kavinsky turns his head to look and sees big blue eyes staring back at him, soft cheekbones, soft grin, and freckles all over and he thinks wow. 

"Is it narcissistic that I kinda want to fuck myself?" is the first thing he says. 

Prokopenko laughs. 

"You've always been a narcissist", he says and kisses him.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi if u wanna comment or leave kudos or both that would be really nice :)


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